Writing as Exorcism: Casting Out Ideas

I was raised in the Pentecostal church. I recall an incident in which my congregation was visiting another on the outskirts of Chicago. Evangelist Jackson had just delivered a fiery sermon and the people were whipped into a frenzy as the Holy Spirit swept through. Elder Walker was asked to pray for every person in the sanctuary. Folks were speaking in tongues and crying out; spiritual shackles were being broken.

Do you remember the skit on Sesame Street where there was a child in each quadrant of the screen? Three of them would be doing the same thing, while the other was doing his own thing. Well, there was a dude sitting calmly and quietly on the back row who seemed out of place. He was the husband of one of the sisters of that church. While she was dancing in the Spirit, he sat there solemnly, with his head down.

Elder Walker called him forward to the prayer line. When he asked if he could pray for him, the man said yes, but the unclean entity inside him manifested and announced that it had other plans...

Though that's a true story, and, as scary as it sounds, has little to do with the type of exorcism of which I am speaking. I am talking about the need to get the ideas (not demons) out of our imaginations and banishing them to paper.

I have my alarm set for 0700 (that's 7am for you civilian types! LOL!) on weekdays. The Beastie Boys' "No Sleep Till Brooklyn" blares when it's time to get up. The funny thing is, I'm usually already up.

Let it be said that I am NOT a morning person. However, after 18 years in a house with a mother who didn't believe in that unicorn called Sleeping In, I was a shoo-in for the military, which pimped that notion to the Nth degree. Now, I find myself sleeping very few hours, waking up with the expectation of a kid at Christmas.

But then, I am a big kid. And every day that God grants me to see is just as good as Christmas. The gift is the talent with which I've been blessed.

Sometimes, that blessing seems like a curse. Apart from the silver lining, the dark, puffy part of the cloud is that everything else in my day seems like a distraction. Juggling as we adults do leaves little time for creative outlets that can easily impinge on sleep and other responsibilities.

But the need to exorcise the barrage of ideas puts me in a constant tailspin.

So, what ever happened to the guy with the red, glowing eyes and guttural voice standing reluctantly in the prayer line? His voice was silenced by Elder Walker. He stood, hunched forward as if ready to pounce, seething and breathing like a large, wild beast. As Walker was about to anoint him, the man--whose demon already vowed that it wasn't coming out--bolted from the church in a dead run to goodness-knows-where. Seems he wasn't down to submit to exorcism.

But I am. I've got to commit to the process daily, lest I run from my destiny as a storyteller.

Get Busy Writing...Dammit!

We’re at the crossroads of the year, standing on the verge of summer. What have you written? I REALLY want to know (HINT: For the daft, dumb and those slow on the uptake, this is a genuine invitation to share your experience).

As for me, I’ve had quite the year so far. Procrastination and constant work aside, I’ve managed to get a few things done in the writing arena. As of the time that I am posting this, I have one novel published and four stories (so far) that will be included in anthologies this year:

1. Dead Assets – an expanded 2^nd edition of my zombie horror novel, originally released in 2012
2. “Everyday Heroes” – co-authored with Pamela Murray, for Writers’ Anarchy III: Heroes & Villains
3. “Fingerprints” – dark fiction/horror, for Darkly Never After
4. “Sugar Weasels in Pants, Damn You” – comedic poem, written as Prolific Knucklehead, for Panthology
5. “Blood Tribe” – horror, for Sins of the Past

Not bad at all, but I still have more work to accomplish. Those were just warm-ups for what else the year holds.

Some time ago, I contacted horror author Brandon Massey and got some great advice from him. Paraphrasing, he said that a key to success was constant output—following one project up with another. It’s the kind of ubiquity Stephen King has achieved in the literary world and Prince has shown musically.

It helps to have a team of qualified cheerleaders giving guidance and encouragement. Mine provide much-needed kicks to the butt, which keep me going.

Though the year is not young, it is far from over. This means that, if you’ve spent the last few months draggin’ ass and making excuses, now is the time to turn it around. Don’t think too long on it; start with a simple plan of an hour a day dedicated to writing.

I already have my next seven projects set to roll. How about you?

Something of a god Complex

I entitled this post with a little "g" in "god", as not to confuse with the Creator of all things.

As an artist (I'm reclaiming this, as I am returning to my love of drawing) and wordsmith, I have the self-assigned responsibility of creating quality work. My last post ("Writing: Illusionary Magic in the Mind's Eye") was about the magic of storytelling. Consider this a followup. Just as a comedian hones his craft to not only get laughs but also inform the audience on the sly (medicine goes down easier with a spoonful of sugar weasels--LOL!), an artist demands the amazement of the onlooker and a writer, the turning of the next page.

I am quite notorious for my twisted sense of humor, which leads to impromptu posts on Facebook. My sister called me one day and I was still giggling from something I'd put out. She said, "You really do find the stuff you post funny, don't you?"

What could I say? If I don't find my comedic stuff hilarious, neither will my audience.

The same goes for the stories I write. If I don't find them interesting, neither will you.

I've been asked for years and years why I've never gotten into sports. Part of it was because my father put more emphasis on martial arts training (as he is an avid chess player and sensei of several schools of martial science) than watching the game. As a kid, I played neighborhood softball, basketball and other stuff. However, as an adult, I never saw the need to follow a team with the zeitgeist of a religious experience. I root for my Chicago teams (hell to the YEAH!) but I'm more caught up in creating my own universe than how much so-and-so's contract is paying over the next 5 years. That doesn't equal money in my pocket.

Just as I emphasized the little "g" in "god", I'm not knocking sports fans in the slightest. I just have other things on my mind...like character development...like creating book series...like keeping my readers entertained and informed. Does that give me a god complex? Maybe a little. But then, God crafted me in His own image, therefore I create...

Writing: Illusionary Magic in the Mind's Eye

When I was a little guy, I always wanted a magic set. My parents brought me several over the years and I learned how to pull a fake rabbit out of a hat, how to make it seem like a ring jumped from one finger to another and, more importantly, how to make a stack of coins transport from my elbow to the palm of my hand. I loved the responses I got from these tricks and took hours, even days to master them. I loved having an audience.

Around the same time, I was experimenting with storytelling. I primarily spun yarns through the medium of self-made comic books, which I would sell to friends and family for a nickel. As the economy shifted and my drawings got better, I increased my prices from a dime to fifteen, all the way to a whopping twenty five cents. The magic was twofold: it allowed my customers to be whisked away into a world where I made the rules; I, in turn, began to believe I could make a profit from producing my own books. Both were pure concepts that still stand today.

Books are magical things. A reader can be so caught up in the illusion that, for a few moments in time, it becomes real. And that's a wonderful thing.

On the flip-side of that coin, there are things that work on the page that would never pan out in real life. I can write up a character who can ignore or bend the laws of gravity to walk on a ceiling without a second thought. Trying to do so in reality could get a person hurt.

In one of my stories, "The Electric Spanking Machine", I advocate passing on the chore of disciplining children to a rather laughable, titular contraption. The reality of such a device being invented and marketed and becoming a worldwide sensation is slim-to-none (though I'd love to make a profit from the sales if it ever did! LOL!), but it's a fun premise to imagine. Especially if, like in the story, you are the mother of twin boys. I penned the story with two sets of adopted twin nephews in mind. Boys are already a handful, but could you imagine something that would ease the pain of raising two?! HAHAHAHAHAHA! It's all about the suspension of disbelief. I took a real issue, turned it on it's head, added heaping helpings of humor and got great results. It was my first published piece and brought many laughs when I read it for audiences.

Life is hard and we could all use an occasional escape. Numbing the pain with drugs, alcohol, or gambling can have dire consequences. Reading books are just as addictive but don't yield such negative results. To provide an escape from bills, relationships, parenting or work, why not curl up with a good book? You'll appreciate it later. Plus, the sugar weasels will love you for it. What are sugar weasels? I don't know; I made them up! It's up to me as a writer to flesh them out enough for your mind to believe they really exist... LOL!

Artwork Time Capsule

Years ago, before I used writing as my sole form of creative output, I was an aspiring graphic novelist. These sketches were dug up from over 20 years ago. Makes me want to pick back up my pencils. What do you think?

Don's Lexicon of Misappropriated Language (Part 1)

DON'S LEXICON OF MISAPPROPRIATED LANGUAGE (Part 1)

Rod Serling set the standard with his speech that opens 'The Twilight Zone.' However, this other dimension has to do with using twisted, carjacked English, re-appropriated for use as I see fit. In this other dimension of not only sight nor sound but of mind, intentional misspellings, double entendres and sugar weaseling of words abound.

That said, here are the terms of the day, broken down so even troglodytes and prolific knuckleheads can understand. Enjoy!

NATHAN: A substitute for "nothing." In a sentence, "That fool thought he was going to rob me but was only doing it for practice. I ain't had nathan in my pockets but lint!"

DEM SHYTZ: A rehashing of "them shits" which, in itself, is improper English. A favorite saying for Steed (have you read 'Dead Assets' yet, mang?), which is a stand-in for just about anything in plurality. In a sentence, "The barbecued ribs were too mild, so I had to put some hot sauce on dem shytz!"

MANG: Scoobert Beardy Mills and PastorKevin McLemore love this term, which I derived from 'Scarface' and Howlin' Wolf's "Mannish Boy" (though the latter comes off more like "main"). It's a mispronunciation of "man", which, when used in a sentence, surpasses gender and is a stand-in term for a person for whom the speaker has some sort of affection or passion. It is often used with the term "main" for humorous effect: "Herb is cool. He's my main mang, mang!"

SLAPCHU: An antiquated term from my old neighborhood, which denotes the putting down of one's pimp hand. "What?! You been out on the corner all night and this is all you have to show for it?! Don't make Sweet Daddy Sugar Weasel have to slapchu!"

CAT: A term of affection for a cool dude. Often used with the term "smoove": "Reggie might be the smoovest cat we know!"

WWF TERMINOLOGY: Used for dramatic, laughable effect: "Every time I get into it with my old lady, she be comin' off the top rope like Jimmy Superfly Snukka with the People's Elbow!"

PIMP SLAPPAGE: Just what it sounds like.

UNCONSCIOUS: To a point that surpasses the senses; to an extreme.

SPANKS: Thanks.

UNDEROOS: (Often used in conjunction with a favorite superhero) Underwear or pajamas, most often for comedic effect. "I was lazy as hell yesterday, sittin' around the house all day rockin' my Captain America Underoos with the trapdoor and the feet in 'em..."

FYC: Short for "f*** yo' couch", from the "Rick James" segment of 'Chappelle's Show'. A favorite inside joke and term of endearment between me, Robert Hall and Charles Streat. The couch can also be replaced with a loveseat (FYLS), ottoman (FYO) or any other random piece of furniture.

HOLLIN' 1-8-7 WMDIYM, FOOL: A term used for a random burst of laughter or unexpected comedy. I won't explain "WMDIYM", though. Reference Snoop and you'll be fine.

WHIPPER-SNAPPER / GIPPER-GAPPER / YOUNG GRASSHOPPER / PADAWAN: A younger or relatively inexperienced individual.

TRUE DAT: Same as "Ain't that the truth!"

I'LL BEHAVE: Same as "Allow me to retort. I just posted something bordering on X-rated when this is a PG-13 format...but I really ain't sorry!"

The Use of Fear as a Prime Mover (No Guts, No Gory!)

A healthy amount of fear is good. It's when that ominous feeling of something going bump in the night goes from the nervous chuckle brought on by the imaginary to the sinking realization that the bump was made intentionally. It's when that healthy dose crosses the line into toxic territory. That's what I want to write about.

So, why write horror? In fact, why focus on things under the bed, hiding in the closet and sitting in the backseat of the car? The same reason amusement parks tout the ritual of perceived--and survived--death on a rollercoaster. You would think that, with all that g-force in the loops, the mind-boggling sense of falling uncontrollably and yelling to the point of decapitation (i.e., screaming your head off) would deter other patrons from boarding the ride. Nope. Instead, people line up and wait in the summer heat their chance to trick out their Limbic systems and say they survived.

One of my favorite movies came up in recent conversation. When George A. Romero unleashed Night of the Living Dead, he tapped into something. Until then, zombies were pitiful creatures who mindlessly followed the bidding of their masters. The Romero zombie wasn't so much mindless as it was single-minded of focus. And that focus was to feed on the living. A primal fear is that of being eaten; even worse, the concept of being eaten alive...and turned into one of them who, in turn, eat. The master wasn't some cheesy bad magician pulling the strings; the master was the compelling urge to consume flesh. Even more disturbing, by all logic a zombie, who is already dead, should have no need to feast. Supposedly, that urge is a leftover from what it did while alive: consume with little regard. Suddenly, the predators become the prey and are inducted into a crazy cult of those of like mind--or like-mindlessness.

The incredible thing is that the director did it on a shoestring budget with unknown actors and without much gore. Yeah, there was the scene when the couple perishes in the truck explosion and for the next couple of minutes, the undead are fighting over their viscera (no guts, no gory!). It's disturbing to say the least but a punctuated payoff of having sat in your seat for that long.

I don't think that a horror movie has to be full of splatter to be scary. Living Dead was a masterstroke of minimalism, served up in black and white. Of course, to top this, Romero returned years later with Tom Savini by his side to serve up eviscerations in living (dead) color. I have nothing against the sequels (to include the remake of Dawn of the Dead, featuring RUNNING zombies, which cause much debate over whether they should lumber or go about speedily) but the original is a masterpiece for a reason.

I grew up in a neighborhood where zombies were heroin addicts in the hallway and where a dead body could remain on the stairs for days before being retrieved. The monsters were real and life was rendered in full color with stereo sound. It gets no scarier.

The monsters in my books are usually creatures that can't help what they do. Be they zombies or gigantic cockroaches, they're only following the script written in their DNA. A human being has a will. When that will runs contrary to another's, monstrous acts may result. I like using the creatures as a catalyst for bringing out the horrific nature of people.